It’s not “This is what your brain is like on drugs”… It’s more like: This is what MY brain is like in anticipation of the first workout after WEEKS of not being able.

First, the brain does a line of sheer ecstaticicity (yes, I’m going to go ahead and make up a few words today). The response is all the bright lights start flashing and sending, like a strobe picture show, images of barbells, dumbbells, kettlebells, bands and more.

Next, the workout has been picked. Over-excitement sets in, because, let’s face it, you cannot wait. You wake up exhausted, every day, for an entire week because you’re doing this workout in your sleep. That’s how much you cannot wait.

Then, you realize, you possibly have been overzealous is picking said workout. It has been six weeks since you’ve done anything other than walk or lightly jog. By the time the doctor’s appointment arrives, you’ll be at 45-days postpartum. AND you DID just have your guts cut open practically… Hmm… Maybe we should rethink that workout.

So, you scrap that workout.

And pick a new one. Made by someone else. But that’s okay. You’ve done this one before and know it’s probably the best “first” workout for you to do.

Then that day comes. It’s like Christmas time. You’re actually awake before the baby is awake and ready to feed. That’s something that doesn’t happen yet. Instead of running to the window to see if there’s snow like you do as a child on Christmas morning, you come downstairs and grin excitedly at that basket of your select favorite weights. You might even wink at it and tell it “Soon my darlings, very soon.”

When the moment comes to workout… You completely blank on what the hell a snatch is. That’s right. You stand there, looking at your kettlebells thinking “How the fuck do I do these again?”

Muscle memory is awesome. It really is. However, memory only works when your brain is on board. And yesterday, my brain decided, as I was working through “The Great Destroyer” from Jen Sinkler’s first Lift Weights Faster, to take a temporary hiatus when it came to the snatches. Each time through.

Naturally, that effected how many times through I was able to do the circuit in the given time frame – not like I was expecting anything fantastical in that department. I figured if I could do three, I’d be doing good.

I managed to do just that. Swing, snatch, squat, clean, press, push up and row my way through three rounds in 15-minutes on the dot.

Back to muscle memory though…

Today, while my baby was napping happily in his swing, I got the chance to hit another workout. This time, it wasn’t a preset workout. It was more, futz around and get done what I get done. Testing my strength in certain areas so I can assess and draw up a solid workout plan that keeps me on track for NOT hurting myself (I find myself reminding myself that I did have a pretty big surgery and even though I look healed and feel top notch, it doesn’t take much).

Wrapping up my workout, I tested my balance and lower body strength. I suffered the most strength loss in my upper body, which was expected given that’s my “trouble spot” when it comes to strength. Lower body was still rocking it right up until I went into labor. And apparently, I’ve still got it.

I successfully did three pistol squats on each side. Yes, I was a little wobbly on one side as compared to the other. And, form on the last one for each side was hovering just at the “acceptable” line. But I did it. I didn’t have to cue my body to do anything really. My core knew when to tighten and hold, my legs knew exactly where to stay in line with, my upper body moved naturally with the movement.

Muscle memory. It’s a beautiful thing.